Does your baby have too many fat rolls? Is she not fitting in her 12-month onesies now that she’s 18 months? Maybe you want your future bodybuilder to start a pre-pubescent workout regime to get a head start at developing those bi’s and tri’s. Either way this Buff Baby Dumbbell Rattle is the kick in the diapers any child will need to realize that they’re wasting their precious time sitting (or laying - for those lesser evolved babies) and babbling like what they have to say is important. (I can only listen to "goobahbrewhahablummubgahboosh" so long before I tune you out.) If your baby starts working out now, he or she will be on the fast-track to Muscle City in no time.
As a person that knows a person that had a child at one point, I know that all babies need to start working those flabby Michelin Man arms. No nursery school wants a weak looking baby!
Ok, so now maybe you’re thinking, “Hmm, if I get my newborn this rattle, and he gets super buff, what is that going to do for his future?” Well, the answer is clear: guaranteed admission into the Navy Seals!
Basically, your child’s buffness will be so excessive that the Navy will have no choice but to appoint him or her to the highest ranking office available. I’m not entirely sure if that’s the President, but if it is, even better. You can also start off your baby’s future patriotic career path with these All-American Baby Rompers. Not only will it show the Navy that your baby is serious about his or her role as an American citizen, but it will also intimidate everyone at the nursery!
Pair it with a star-spangled bandanna and sporty sunglasses, and your child’s future is set.
Warning: Never let your baby use steroids while using the Buff Baby Dumbbell Rattle, because that’s just messed up man.